Somehow, Dave had gotten a job managing a resort in Vava'u, Tonga called Mala Island Resort. He's long gone from Tonga, and the resort is under new management. However, this is my story of Dave. I initially met Dave when looking at real estate in Tonga. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)) Upon meeting Dave, it appeared he liked to come off as a rich island owner with access to all the finest things in life. He claimed that Madonna and Metallica played this resort on New Years (no chance in hell), that he produced the Cure, did remixes for the Offspring, met Prince (more on this later), etc.
At the time, I chalked it up to him being a big talker, but nothing really criminal came up. My wife and I moved to Tonga a year later, and went to stay at Mala while we looked for an apartment. Dave remembered us and pretended that he was giving us free food and booze if we payed for the room, and he was always part of the party. I had brought with me a hard drive full of music that was having problems, and he pretended that he had some amazing internet connection set up with his "guy in the states," and would help me transfer the files. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)).
He ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). Of some of the lies he told, this was my favorite. I'm from Minnesota, so Dave's insane brain made the Prince/Mall of America/snowmobile connection (he's not stupid), and he came up with a story in which Prince tried to hire him, tempt him with naked women, and then snowmobile to the Mall of America for some event with him. You can't snowmobile from Paisley Park to Mall of America. Not possible. Illegal. Dangerous. I took everything with a grain of salt until he told the entire town that I was a "porn addict." He claimed that I gave him a hard drive (the nerve!) and that it was totally loaded with porn. Everyone I met for months asked me about that.
All I needed to say is "consider the source." I could have easily, very easily, broken his face. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). He's very good at getting to know what people want and offering that to them, especially less intelligent people. It was hard to even break this news to people I considered intelligent; Dave is not going to have you live on this island. Dave is not going to be your friend. Dave is not going to be your boyfriend. Dave doesn't have a Ferrari, Dave doesn't know Phil Collins, and on and on and on. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)).
Malaisland.com Reviews
Somehow, Dave had gotten a job managing a resort in Vava'u, Tonga called Mala Island Resort. He's long gone from Tonga, and the resort is under new management. However, this is my story of Dave. I initially met Dave when looking at real estate in Tonga. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)) Upon meeting Dave, it appeared he liked to come off as a rich island owner with access to all the finest things in life. He claimed that Madonna and Metallica played this resort on New Years (no chance in hell), that he produced the Cure, did remixes for the Offspring, met Prince (more on this later), etc.
At the time, I chalked it up to him being a big talker, but nothing really criminal came up. My wife and I moved to Tonga a year later, and went to stay at Mala while we looked for an apartment. Dave remembered us and pretended that he was giving us free food and booze if we payed for the room, and he was always part of the party. I had brought with me a hard drive full of music that was having problems, and he pretended that he had some amazing internet connection set up with his "guy in the states," and would help me transfer the files. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)).
He ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). Of some of the lies he told, this was my favorite. I'm from Minnesota, so Dave's insane brain made the Prince/Mall of America/snowmobile connection (he's not stupid), and he came up with a story in which Prince tried to hire him, tempt him with naked women, and then snowmobile to the Mall of America for some event with him. You can't snowmobile from Paisley Park to Mall of America. Not possible. Illegal. Dangerous. I took everything with a grain of salt until he told the entire town that I was a "porn addict." He claimed that I gave him a hard drive (the nerve!) and that it was totally loaded with porn. Everyone I met for months asked me about that.
All I needed to say is "consider the source." I could have easily, very easily, broken his face. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). He's very good at getting to know what people want and offering that to them, especially less intelligent people. It was hard to even break this news to people I considered intelligent; Dave is not going to have you live on this island. Dave is not going to be your friend. Dave is not going to be your boyfriend. Dave doesn't have a Ferrari, Dave doesn't know Phil Collins, and on and on and on. ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)). ((REDACTED BASED ON FINDINGS VIA COURT ORDER)).